She asked him with doubtful eyes: " You don't love me, Do you? "
He remained silent, she could see the moves of his lips but no words came out, He looked at her eyes deeply as if he wanted to tell her somethin that he couldn't say in words .. While lookin at her hopin that she may understand what he wanted to say, She was takin a deep look at every inch of his face that she has always admired, she was lookin at his narrow mean eyes, recallin every memory they once had together movin her eyes up to his dark short hair.
She kept wonderin & observin the fast move of his eyelashes when suddenly his eyes became teary, she didn't seem to understand what he wanted to say or in other words, she didn't want to believe it, She wondered are those tears out of guilt, pain or he was too helpless to explain ?, How badly she wished he would say something; anything, it would be much more easier & relievin than lettin her sinkin in her assumptions & doubts, She painfully asked herself " Don't I deserve at least an answer, a word, a goodbye ?" .. Her eyes started to be filled with tears too, the image of his face wasn't clear anymore; too many tears were rollin down her cheecks, every tear was takin away a part of her. She remembered how many times she assured him that she will always be beside him no matter what & that he is her & everythin else is just details & how he kept repeatin " You are my sun but I don't deserve you, I will never deserve you." Still, Sielnce was playin the greatest role, not even a word pentrated that bitter silence that seemed eternal. She wasn't intendin to say anythin, she was tryin to tell him through her eyes "Oh Love, please, say somethin" askin him through her teary eyes " Then why, why from the start?". She kept starin & admirin his pale face which was derived from any helpin expression, However. He was tryin to avoid her eye-contact, he had nothin to say, he had to be strong & cold hearted infornt of the only one who he had truly loved, She was lookin at him with a huge bitterness inside, his silence was tearin her apart into small tiny pieces ,She silently took a deep peaceful look at his face; She knew that it wouldl be her last time to see him; his silence said it all ..
She started to take a little steps backwards then slowly turned her back on him, she continued walkin away from him slowly feelin a bitterness she has never felt before, Her hands were tremblin so much, she wasn't even able to wipe her tears as if she lost control on every organ in her body, she was like a sleepin volcano which suddenly became active but wasn't able to explode, she wanted to scream out but she couldn't, she kept all that anger, bitterness & pain inside, tears were inevitably rollin down her eyes, she couldn't prevent them & that hurt her even more, she was in total mess & everything around her people, blocks, children everythin seemed to disappear, as if she is the only one who is livin on this rude planet, no sounds but the sounds of the cracks of her breakon heart, she was dyin inside, she kept walkin away, leavin all those beautiful dreams that would make sense no more; leavin her heart behind & the more steps she took, the more she felt a huge wall enlargin between him & her, she didn't even think of lookin back or runnin back into his arms blamin him or askin why or even slapin him on his face. she couldn't have done that anyway, no matter what she won't bear to hurt him, However. She was too proud, there was no use of makin herself sound like a fool again enough what he has just done to her, she knew that he is gone forever, she kept holdin her arms together huggin her self tightly hiddin her head between her arms .. she knew that she had to go on; half alive .. she had to do so as he had to ..
He .. He kept standin still in his place, didn't move an inch & she just kept goin on by .. goin on by as if she was on a train, till she disappeared from his sight, He felt as if his soul was gradually takin from him, He knew so well that she was irreplaceable, she was life in it's craziest way, she was sun in the utmost warmth on a very cold day, she was beauty in it's simplest elegant way, she was that beautiful smilin moon on the dark days, she was a mother in her kindest way, she was love in it's most passionate way, she was him in his most beautiful state, she was a child in his purest silliest way .. He remembered how they used to fight so hard & ended up laughing like crazy. He couldn't bear to see her tears, she rarely showed them to anyone even him, he knew how much she was proudful & preferred to keep everythin to herself. However, she looked at him with a silent beautiful smile ruined by the rollin tears that she tried to hold & hide but failed, he knew that she didn't want the last thing to remember of her to be tears, regret, anger, blame & so; walkin away silently from him, made him felt even worse, he wished that she had screamed or slapped him but she did nothing of that. She painfully wore her beautiful smile as if she was sayin "It's okay, Love".. He had to leave her, he was dyin inside too but couldn't help it! , he started to walk in the opposite direction, feelin way as much as she felt, He didn't want to be the only one she loved & the only one who broke her heart , he hated himself that he wished to die, go back & tell her .." No, I do, I do, I really do love you more than this whole world which will become a huge trash without your presence", But he didn't want to be selfish, he wanted the best for her, he didn't deserve her after all, it was impossible & no use to wait for him, he kept walkin away as if he was walkin away from life or lettin it go; wonderin how he loved her, still do & awlays will even more than life itself .. Oh god, how much emptiness he felt as if he is nothin, feelin nth, headin for nth; He no longer cared bout anythin ..
Minutes, Hours, Days, Months even years went by & .. He .. He .. never heard from her since that day ..
She was everythin to him, He was everythin to her
